I am getting a bit vulnerable here today 😔 --I am pretty depressed about being Totally financially dependent on my husband !
I get it --some people would Kill to have someone support them and help take that financial burden off of them --I really do understand that, I do !
For me it has been this 3rd person in our marriage that looms over every other decision and has created just way too much stress over the years. For me it feels like an incredibly powerless place to be on so many occasions.
I asked myself --how did I get here?? Well like a lot of moms with kids--it started with them! I remember the first moment I went part time right after my first child. I was a bit reluctant but I wanted to do both. I kept that up that part time business up until I was pregnant with our 4th.
The Part Time Daycare was So Crazy High that whatever money I did make--went towards that--and the constant pull of trying to be both was very taxing as you moms know. Especially when your barely making any money as it was.
I fell on the floor crying one day when I unexpectedly found out I was pregnant for the 4th child because I just knew I could not keep this up any longer and that for the sake of all of us --I let go of my last attachment to making my own money.
So years go by and I squeak out some a few home based things that pull in cash here and there but nothing that gets me very far. I usually had 5 things in the hopper waiting for that money--so it was gone before it hit the bank.
Now here I am a 43 year old woman and while I am still married and we still share all of our money--I feel as if I have nothing that I can actually call my own.
This money challenge has just made me really have to look at a lot of things up close and personal and this is one area where I desperately want to come back to and find that person in me that loved taking care of herself financially.
*That person that knew she had a ton to offer
*That person that felt empowered to decide how to spend money without consulting anyone !
*That person that knew she could take care of herself
*That person that got excited on learning on how to take care of her money and watch it grow
*That person that got so excited when I bought my first piece of furniture all by myself
I do want to Honor my husband and all of the Sacrifices he has to make over the years as well. He has been Solely responsible for 6 people for years and that is no easy task and he has done it with no complaints.
I am sure he would not mind me finding that person again too !
Financial dependence, money, mindset, 100 days of loving money, personal power, marriage, financial partnership, motherhood, wife, stay at home mom😁
Educator on the connection of mind and body, Hippie at Heart, mother of 4, Living in the MIdwest --changing to change the world one idea at a time !